Cultivating Life Force Part I: How to Patch the Drain and Reclaim the Spark
The road to self-healing is filled with mines and opportunities that I uncovered by stepping on a great deal of them. In this series I share my notes from this journey.
DISCLAIMER: I am not a medical professional. The information below consists of my opinions and observations, inspired by a personal health crisis that taught me to address energy loss with natural methods. I rely on common sense and data from broad-spectrum frequency measurements of the human electromagnetic field, a modality not recognized by modern medicine. Nothing I say should be considered medical advice. You should still call 911 in case of emergency.
THE CELLS OF WONDER
The cell, the smallest independently functioning unit of life, is a miracle of self-repair. Just try to break her apart by living a full life.
Bombard her with parties, radiation, toxins, environmental wear and tear, psychological trauma, the angry aunt, the 9-to-5, the perennial drama with lovers, spouses, and family - the Modern Life cocktail.
The cell responds with cool handyman zeal, employing parallel pathways to fix DNA damage, enzymes to neutralize free radicals, chaperones to repair protein folds, and an inventory of new spare parts to replace the old and squeaky - like a combat medic in battle.
At the end of the manufacturing line is a brand new life unit ready for duty - Cell 2.0. That is, if the energy trying to pull the cell apart doesn't exceed the energy of the repair crew, the minimum viable equation to maintain health.
If the cell keeps getting worse, the repair crew is likely losing the battle, necessitating new tricks. The superorganism with some 37 trillion cells may have to let go of old narratives and embrace a less explored aspect of themselves to avoid a tailspin.
Cell regeneration and adaptation to environmental changes would be impossible if we only relied on chemical reactions rather than the alchemy of music that ultimately defines our being. The ancients referred to this music as prana, chi, or energeia. Obi-Wan Kenobi talked about the Force. Our generation refers to it as the Field.
Although its definition varies wildly, the Field is a biophysical reality that directs 37 trillion cells in our body with over 400 billion reactions per second, at speeds that imply quantum tunneling - instant synchronization of data regardless of distance - a phenomenon observed between galaxies, subatomic particles, and cells.
Similar quirkiness takes place also between our micro-organisms. Our bacteria outnumber the human cells by 3 to 1, with over 9 million different genes and hundreds of trillions of viruses and fungi. All these distinguished members of our microbial society share information and energy with wave principles that evade modern science.
We are electric first, chemical second, wrapped in a profound mystery where mind, body, and spirit form one symphony orchestra. Modern science can scratch only the surface of this riddle when it tries to deconstruct our smallest life unit with chemistry alone.
Every cell has a voltage that differs according to its function. Neurons have a resting membrane potential of about -70 millivolts (mV). Skeletal muscle cells and cardiac muscle cells, around -90mV. When our cells switch from resting to peak, they exhibit up to 120mV change, or 0.12 volts of action potential.
Electric currents regulate the heart, ensuring adequate time for the heart chambers to fill and pump blood. Currents enable our mind via the action potential of neurons, and produce 95 percent of our daily energy requirement via the action potential of mitochondria.
Voltage defines the rouge on our cheeks, the sprint in our legs, how we deal with the hooded guy in the dark alleyway, our clarity, awareness, speed, and adaptability to new circumstances.
Imagine the cumulative action potential of trillions of cells, a veritable Zeus with the power of a billion lightning bolts at its fingertips - an apt metaphor for the human energy miracle in its uncompromised form.
A fully operational Field extends its subtle electromagnetic tendrils up to 15 feet around itself, playing music with other living creatures in a constant exchange of information and energy - whether we're aware of it or not.
The Field is the ultimate space of opportunities for improving our well-being - largely ignored because of our obsessive focus on matter.
But there is a catch.
Our species is under an asymmetric attack of an intensity and scale never before witnessed in our evolutionary history, an invisible war that dissolves our zest gradually, like frogs in simmering water, making us increasingly dependent on a centralized, authoritarian system for every aspect of our lives - especially our health.
A war so vast in scope that we need to squeeze every millivolt of our being to understand and challenge it.
Cultivating life force is not just about a "healing journey," but a call to action in the greatest mythic tale spun on humanity - to rise above ourselves despite ourselves.
UNDERSTANDING ROBINSON CRUSOE
“There is a war against light and it's draining the hell out of you,” shouted a Robinson Crusoe lookalike to me once on Venice Beach.
He waved a placard of a kindergarten-style sketch of the sun - the reverse-smiley variety.
Crusoe missed both his shoes and one leg of his pants. He looked like he hadn't shaved since the last moon landing. His eyes gleamed to connect with someone, anyone, but was met with blank, distracted stares - including mine.
For a second, I wondered what circumstances had molded this poor man, only to revert to my snug existence - the one in which I was convinced that I had a grip on Reality.
Common mistake.
It took me decades to understand how far from that grip I was. I recognize this today with a full set of pants and shoes.
Crusoe was right.
We’re not just leaking light, we’re suppressing the few resources that can give us a refill.
The first mistake is that we rely on scientifically, medically, and academically stamped narratives - a form of scientism popularized by experts and media - that cause harm to human health.
Captured narratives have infiltrated every industry we depend on for daily life, including light, nutrition, hydration, telecommunications, consumer care, modern medicine, even alternative medicine.
The tales zap us for a deliberate purpose. If we are drained and distracted, we are more likely to trust and follow directives - the modus operandi of a centralized collective, or gulag.
We need to let go of the gulag narratives.
The challenge is, the more ingrained our belief system, the more analytical our intelligence, the deeper our knowledge, the sharper our expertise, the harder it is to let go.
And even if we are ready to let go, who and what do we trust if not the tales that formulated our perception of the world?
We are what we perceive, which is why a genuine shift of perception is also a shift in Being.
NAVIGATING RIVER STYX
It took me more than a decade to make that shift after a health crash in my early 40s, as a victim of the classic Drain caused by modern lifestyle.
The definition of the Drain is simple: it’s the period during which we expend more energy than we are able to recharge, going uninterrupted long enough to hinder us from our potential.
As many of us may have forgotten, we used to be perfectly self-healing creatures as long as someone didn't hold our head under the water. Today, energy deficiency has become a norm, and unless we counter it consciously, we will continue to plummet until we hit the point of no return.
I didn't know how common the Drain is when I first realized something was up with my health. Or rather, down. Nor did I understand anything else about human energy.
I was in trouble, not because of the burnout as much as the advice and prescriptions I was getting from experts who were stuck on my symptoms, rather than their cause.
Symptom myopia is common in both modern and alternative medicine. This is why the healing journey often degrades to a repetitive kangaroo jump from one expert to another.
The stage when we usually spot the Drain is in the ambulance, the ICU, or the sterile reception room. It’s often delivered by an expert who doesn’t meet our eyes.
The initial symptoms can manifest as any combination of physical and mental issues depending on our individual metabolic Achilles Heel.
Today, statistically, only one in twenty manages to avoid the Drain before their 50s if they live in an industrialized country. After that, pretty much everyone gets sucked by its vortex - while confusing the symptoms with aging.
The Drain crept on me like a slow-motion, shapeshifting vampire. From multiple angles. Too early.
My body gradually lost the ability to resist microbial intrusions, starting with suspiciously frequent allergies, rashes, and infections - graduating with blood poisoning supposedly potent enough to kill me within a few days should I not get on an experimental antibiotic dripper.
My mind was a similar mess. I lost interest in pursuing life’s luminous modalities. Although I was gifted with reasonable talents to succeed in multiple endeavors, I let the opportunities slip by. My underperformance was not due to a character trait. It was due to an energetic tailspin.
An important difference to note early in the Drain: if we mistake the loss of life juice for a fault in character, we blame ourselves, which then accelerates the Drain further. I made the mistake of taking it personally.
All my life I'd been athletic. I ate conscientiously. I maintained optimal weight and an entrepreneurial disposition. I thought I did everything right. Yet I landed in the ICU with three days to live.
The near-call was followed by a series of other complications - from parasite infestations to autoimmune symptoms - that seemed unrelated to each other. I had a serial relationship with pills, potions, and supplements for years, pretending everything was under control if I did what the experts said.
The underlying loss of life juice that drove my metabolic distress also had a grip on my moods. I acquired a genius at hiding depression - especially from myself - under a subtle cloak of cynicism and besserwisserism. I believe this type of cloaking is common during the Drain.
Some people hide the blues with faux mirth. Or they develop a sense of excessive self-importance, a defensive obsession about their identity.
Take a tally of your circle. Anyone who can’t handle critical self-introspection without a meltdown is likely getting Drained. They need help.
The increasingly extremist placard-waving factions that promote wokeism, gender dysphoria, racial segmentation, and general cluelessness, for example, all feed on the Drain. They also need help.
When we're Drained, we lie to ourselves as well as to our friends. We may even develop a subtle split personality. One is the Ubermeister, or Dr. Jekyll, who sees the Self in its full energetic potential and pretends to be real. The other is the Victim, or Mr. Hyde, who experiences the full brunt of the Drain and hides in a cocoon.
JEKYLL AND HYDE
On the biochemical level, both Jekyll and Hyde are compromised in the Drain. Hampered cellular energy (ATP) production rides along with inflammation, oxidative stress, lymph system blockades, immune depletion, circulatory issues, neurodegenerative conditions, hypothyroidism, et cetera, all of which are examined (or autopsied) as separate affairs by the modern medical system.
During a Drain, the Autonomous Nervous System (ANS) goes on the defensive, spritzing the system with stress hormones to provide the body with ersatz energy. The stress chemicals shift blood and energy circulation to the exteriors, priming the body for fight-flight-freeze situations - which take place in the mind instead of the wild where the reflex was designed for.
We literally confabulate the beasts that bring our metabolic doom from the safety of our homes.
As metabolic stress becomes more or less permanent, the Drain starts undermining the center of our being - the gut biome - which then cascades into more serious conditions.
As was my case, commonly benevolent critters suddenly became pathogenic as my resistance was flatlined. The thyroid scaled back energy production to conserve the increasingly limited ATP resources for a threat-laden future. Compromised neurotransmitters manufactured by the gut bacteria led to depression, anxiety, irrational fears, and mood shifts.
The gut is the center of our energy fusion, which is why it’s the primary target of so many asymmetric attack vectors, including seed oils and chemicals that corrode gut lining.
The mental stress caused by our body complications loops back into the nervous system, preparing for more disaster readiness, leading to more stress hormones, more inflammation, and more anxiety.
Meanwhile, on the surface, we usually stay in denial, suppressing the negative with more distractions, pacifiers, and excuses.
The sensation of being flooded by stress hormones becomes normalized over time. We become dependent on the “stress high,” which provides us with a fake sense of oomph.
We may subconsciously behave in a way that secures the continuous release of stress hormones by engineering drama, the quickest way being to mess up our significant relationships. Our internal pharmacy - the fastest dealer around the block - will happily serve us more junk if we upset our spouse with innovative acts of disgruntlement.
Bang - we shoot up more cortisol and adrenaline, ready to fight the injustice, to protect our rights and identity - in the office, kitchen, bedroom, and social media feed.
The false sense of vitality is likely to carry on into the night, disrupting deep sleep, which over time cascades into further issues.
The self-induced drama can go on for years, even decades, before it starts shapeshifting into a diagnosable manifestation - a tumor, neurocognitive disease, autoimmune condition, chronic fatigue, obesity, et cetera - any of the thousands of variations of modern disease acronyms that finally warrant a prescription rolodex and endless clinic visits.
Once we start the medication pipeline, our odds of exiting the tailspin are dramatically reduced, as the meds are often associated with a long list of side effects that accelerate the Drain, making us foggier and weaker.
There is no pill or protocol that can fix the Drain. There is no external - modern or alternative - method that can cure us from the tailspin. Pills can suppress one symptom while causing another. The same goes for scalpels and radiation. Removing the manifestation doesn’t remove the causation.
Our only recourse is to identify the root causes and address them ourselves by changing our circumstances, attitude, behavior, and lifestyle.
As I matured in my understanding of human energy, I understood that all my symptoms were part of one energy narrative - even if I got 1001 different medical diagnoses.
I had to suspend my belief in modern medical narrative - based in logic and analysis - and take responsibility for myself - based on gut and intuition.
I made a hard decision to trust only what felt right, and avoid what didn’t - whether it was about protocols, people, places, or nutrition.
CONNECTING WITH THE WHISPERING ORACLE
This is the stage when a basic awareness of our Field becomes particularly useful, when we grasp that we're more than a compilation of blood and bones, that we can both transmit and receive energy by cherrypicking vibrations, by consciously choosing the circumstances that are energy positive.
It’s also the stage when we need to prioritize ourselves over others, just like taking the oxygen mask before handing it to a child when the aircraft cabin loses pressure. Energetic "selfishness" is a necessary strategy when we try to reverse the Drain, or we will never be useful to anyone in the future.
We need to quiet down the logical mind - battered by captured narratives - and pass the baton to the intuitive mind by asking questions from the only source that’s still reliable: the whispering oracle otherwise known as our body.
What are the signals that led us to our original energetic imbalance?
There is never one or two. There are a dozen that feed each other in a 1+1+1=5 relationship. All Drain is cumulative and multifactorial. There can be prime drivers, but since the body is designed as an infinitely adaptive energy wonder, it is really hard to deplete without an asymmetric attack on its core.
The body tries to signal us in various ways about what’s happening during the Drain and how to reverse it, but we’re not geared to listen. We're likely distracted and clouded by anxiety.
The body is like Crusoe trying to wave a primitive placard in our face, but we confuse the signal with the rest of the noise, maybe pop a pill, or switch on the entertainment to drown the noise further.
After we fail to get help from modern medical diagnoses and protocols, we may look for advice from more esoteric sources and experience yet another letdown.
I was told to “listen to my body” by a self-righteous yogi who was thin enough to be transparent, pale as a sheet of paper, and blamed meat on all the ills of mankind. Of course, I ignored him.
“Listen to your body” has lost its meaning in translation, which is why I refer to the process as Let Go and Tune In (LGTI). Feel free to rename it with your unique handle, as the process varies wildly from individual to individual.
In my case, LGTI consists of the following.
Let Go stands for the suspension of the chit-chatting Oompa Loompas who always ponder the past and the future. They live in the frontal brain and are mostly concerned about our identity, gossiping about our prospects and other people like Greek grandmothers. Letting go of them requires a visualization trick, as if we lift the Self slightly above ourselves. Then we observe the character who is consumed by its thoughts and existence just beneath our elevated domain. This is the Observer looking down at its Avatar.
I found that I can best achieve this while hiking in nature. No need to sit cross-legged in a stale room with artificial lights. A fluid mind in a moving body is most adaptive to new thought models.
When we at last feel a pleasant buzz of non-attachment, we Tune In to the silent space within and outside the Avatar. It’s not perfect silence, but more like the whooshing of an electromagnetic ocean.
Tuning into this space sensitizes us to the clues we’re missing in our daily lives - as long as we can observe and listen without judgement or analysis.
The Observer takes inventory of the mental and physical signals of our Avatar and then later drops the insights to us as an inner voice, visual symbols, or insights - depending on our trait. Both the type of messenger and the message are always unique.
We might find out that in addition to eating junk, the Avatar may be unhappy in its job, working on stuff that is misaligned with its deeper character, breathing noxious fumes from the bedroom window, not getting enough light or movement, pretending to be happy in a marriage of convenience, reeling from an excess exposure to heavy metals, or suppressing some type of truth from itself. There are a million and one unique Drain combinations that can prevent the cells from completing their maintenance cycles.
I discovered messages embedded in my daily stream of reality that steered me away from some habits and towards others. Some were more dramatic confabulations, like virtual projections, with clear warnings.
I learned to recognize a series of addictions, the pursuit of dopamine highs and distractions, a life focusing on comforts and security. My healing required the opposite, the pursuit of adventures and unpredictability that came with significant discomfort, fears, and resistance.
How did I find what I needed without 1001 meetings with a licensed psychiatrist?
One piece of the message was delivered by Chinese twins who materialized like holographs at a potluck party in Los Angeles. The twins were convivial and steered themselves close enough to introduce themselves. Then they popped the cork and told me I was "jaded," a diagnosis that's considered relatively lethal in China. They stated matter-of-factly that I had to find my light again or die. And poof! They were gone.
This is the point where I usually lose the audience. Seeing and interacting with ghosts can be diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenia, but it can also be the side effect of a well-executed LGTI spin.
Were the Chinese real? No way to be sure. The good news is that the form of the messenger doesn’t matter, as long as we download and process the message. Real or unreal, the Chinese were right.
Why was I jaded? I looked down at my Avatar clearly for the first time. He did indeed look greyer than my Ubermeister projection of myself.
What did I need to do, to seek, to change all that? I submitted the question to my next LGTI round.
That's how the process works. We dig deeper, unattached, Sherlocking the hell out of our Avatar, and how it perceives Reality. Deeper every round, until the process becomes a permanent feature of our lives.
Self-empowerment, the journey from Victim to Protagonist, from Hyde to Jekyll, hinges on the understanding that we not only perceive but also mold our Reality.
CURIOUS THING ABOUT REALITY
Consider that no human has ever witnessed true Reality - nor even come close to imagining it.
The 1.3kg (2.9 lbs) of grey matter is ill-equipped to handle the data deluge of Infinity. The brain renders sound, color, matter, solids, and an emotional landscape to help us navigate a unified field of vibrations with the best possible shot of surviving the Grand Mystery of Everything.
Our "Reality" is an in-house simulation, a movie we generate in our skull with an 80-millisecond lag, the time it takes to translate the nonstop tsunami of electric and electromagnetic signals that the Universe relentlessly pours on us. Out pops a 576-megabyte render, a 3D version that feels, looks, sounds, and tastes like the real thing - yet at best is a rough approximation.
Reality only feels like the "real thing" because it’s the only cheese on the platter. We can't compare it to Camembert if the latter doesn't exist.
Everyone has their own cheese platter - usually with only one variety they term as the Objective Truth - the one we're ready to fight wars for in the trenches, the kitchen, and the bedroom - but it’s really just a Fabrication.
Let’s be double clear about this because it’s the most powerful secret to taking charge of our destiny. Reality is always a personal fabrication, and therefore we have the freedom, power, and sometimes the duty, to improve it, to alter it, to let go of it.
The challenge is that once the Fabrication solidifies, usually by the 20s, our perception becomes relatively inflexible as our neurons lose their plasticity - a condition otherwise regularly referred to as maturity.
Rather than looking for ways to alter our "mature" Reality, we will fight like hell to defend it. We will filter our friends and partners in a way that supports our individual Fabrication. We love talking to people who share a similar Fabrication and ignore or judge others. We will defend our Fabrication to death because it's all we got. Yet, cultivating life force usually requires letting go of standard aka mature Reality.
We also have to let go of other people's opinions about what’s happening to us when we start changing - who may easily confuse the process with "losing it.” They’re right, after all, we really are losing “it” - the old narrative - if we’re successful.
At the height of my LGTI process, I dealt with realities that were off the bend, often amplified by psychoactive plants in Amazonian medicine circles. I experienced demons dancing around me in the forest in what felt like an exorcism, and a dark sorceress wiping out bad spirits from me with a broom. I was terrified by these encounters before I understood their significance as messengers.
A visit to a psychiatrist with these experiences would have gotten me an SSRI prescription and halted my progression with a mental fog. It’s necessary to face our demons with a clear mind. Not suppress or run away.
Hallucinations were considered messages from gods in aboriginal cultures to the point that they intentionally induced them with psychotropics to gain direction in their lives. Today this process has been popularized by ayahuasca circles and modern shamans, many of whom never got proper training for the job.
The common mistake modern shamanic journeyers make is that they experience a vision without taking heed of the message. True transformation requires us to integrate the message into our daily lives, by changing our environment, our relationships, lifestyle, and attitude.
Genuine visions portray ways to re-engineer our Fabrication in a way that helps us connect with our essence - what we were designed for - which in turn facilitates free and unencumbered energy flow.
It’s an empowering realization to experience Reality as the play arena that shapeshifts with our attitude. We don’t need to take things too seriously anymore, especially ourselves. We can start playing.
GOING ON THE COUNTERATTACK
The lessons from my “hallucinations” were the turning point in my trajectory. I began to pull back and look at the big picture, how I got here, and why. The answer is usually much simpler than we think.
In the classical "fish in a tank" analogy of chronic disease, the fish is acting sluggish and needs help. Modern medicine is trained to think that the fish needs to be fixed somehow. Or maybe the fish is under attack by something that needs to be destroyed. Hence prescriptions, scalpels, radiation, antibiotics, and so on.
Empathic doctors, naturopaths, holistic healers also look at the circumstances. They might suggest changing the water in the tank since it could be stale or polluted. Or maybe the fish is feeling lonely or stressed, lacking healthy foods, light, or an inspiring challenge.
Changing the circumstances usually triggers the turning point.
Once we have cleaned the tank and addressed fundamentals like nutrition, hydration, and movement, we can start taking giant leaps by observing and adjusting our attitude - the most ignored and most powerful human energy facilitator in human life.
I began with a self-imposed dietary discipline, with intermittent fasting, total carbohydrate elimination, detoxing, sweating, rich mineral hydration, long-distance swimming in the ocean, mountain hiking, and frequent grounding.
I changed my circumstances from the epicenter of Los Angeles to a small village in Peloponnese, Greece, close to the Spartan mountains, and inhaled the energy of ancient myths.
I nourished myself with pure animal fats and olive oil, the daily catch from the ocean, organic meat and organs, and mountain stream water. I opted for heavy resistance, long hikes, and short sprints up the hills, with regular full-body exposure to the sun morning and evening.
I learned to listen to my body not just in meditative phases, but nearly constantly, with the Observer on alert. How did I feel 20 minutes after eating? What did I sense from a novel encounter, a person or endeavor? Who were the people, what were the activities, places, mindsets, thoughts, and emotions that charged me? Drained me?
I stopped taking directives from experts if I didn’t confirm their logic with my gut.
I began to pay attention to my stress signals and mood shifts - how they were triggered, and how to manage the triggers. Our reaction to stress signals can be managed, the signal not so much.
I began to observe myself as a transceiver, a beacon, rather than a construct of chemistry and matter, and projected the same idea on people and places I came across. I recognized that everything is part of a conscious architecture, and that our thoughts affect its form.
I became picky with whom or where to spend my time and how - a critical component for determining our energy flow. I also recognized that the Who, Where, and What is a constantly changing paradigm we need to respect with proactive changes.
Ergo, when we prioritize energy over identity, we will discover axiomatic truths about our well-being, such as…
If getting attached to a particular definition of "me" is Draining, let go of that “me” and seek new forms of being.
If getting entangled in a particular Fabrication is Draining, engineer new circumstances.
If trying to settle down is Draining, unsettle.
If trying to be Normal is draining, go for abnormal.
If getting stuck in a particular relationships is draining, let go of the attachment before letting go of the relationship. The culprit is usually the attachment, and not the other person.
If comfort and safety are Draining, try discomfort, risk, and unpredictability for size.
And so on.
Every signal in our environment either amplifies or weakens our essence - we just need to gauge the signals and stay loyal to them.
No one else carries our individual Field so why should anyone else be in charge of its management, in defining what’s good or bad for us?
It is our destiny to sculpt our universe at leisure, in a calm state of flow, and stand in wonder at what She can manifest.
This is what the ancient Greeks referred to as ἐnergeia.
Next In The Series…
Cultivating Life Force Part II: Why We Need to Worship the Sun
Great writing! I have similar ideas about healing and reconnecting to our bodies.
Here's what not to do, the opposite of what you wrote which is how the system tries to keep us down.
https://robc137.substack.com/p/transmarginal-inhibition-the-way?
Here's an interesting site that can help many
https://garysharpe.substack.com/
Yes!